Embarassing dance moments and how to make things better
This evening I had my first experience knocking someone upside the head with an elbow. I know I didn’t collide too hard with the side of his face, but I definitely made contact and I felt horrible. I was falling all over myself apologizing, while still trying to keep dancing. It’s bound to happen once in a while, and I was being led through a relatively complicated set of arm locks and maneuvers in a Salsa. As a follow, one thing I always say I need work on is following those crazy arm combinations… back and forth and over the head and under and all over the place. I’m always afraid I’m going to whack someone and this evening those fears panned out. I can only be grateful that I didn’t hit him that hard and that it was a person I know relatively well, so he did his best to make me feel better after, which is a good thing!
After I had become coherent again after my babbling apologies, he slowed down and showed me the move he had done step-by-step, talking me through what was going on, and I made it through without causing further injury. Toward the end of the song, he did the same move again and this time I was able to follow at tempo without causing injury. I really appreciated the way he handled the situation, and took the time to show me where I had gone wrong, causing the elbow incident. From a follow to a lead, this is one of the greatest things you can do for your follow. If they get lost and confused on a move, and especially if some sort of elbowing or arm wrenching is caused on either side, take the time to slow down and show the girl what you wanted her to do. It will make her a better dancer by increasing her knowledge of moves, and it will help you become a better lead through really focusing on the lead so that the girl can learn it. I’ve had some dancers throw a move at me that I’d never seen before, or that had some weird lead that I wasn’t expecting, and as I still have a great deal to learn about dancing, I messed up the move… but instead of giving me feedback on how I could have improved, or trying again with a stronger lead, they shrug it off or make a gesture as if I wasn’t good enough. Us girls can only improve with help from the wonderful leads out there. I’ve had some amazing guys take the time to talk me through a move while they do it, or try it again until I get it, instead of pretending they hadn’t done it at all, and this has done a great deal to help my dancing. As for girls, try your best to be attentive when you are dancing with someone who does a new move. If you mess up once, try and do it better last time, or ask them to do the move again. I’ve had times where I messed up and asked could we please try that again, and the second time I was able to follow.
Dancing is about having fun, but each dance you go to should also be a learning experience. Dances are a chance to meet new people, see some cool new tricks, and try your best to pick up a few new moves. Help each other out with it. And don’t forget, experienced girls can teach guys new moves too! I dance with a lot of guys who are just learning, and so I try and give them feedback on how they could lead something better, or try and tell them how to lead a new move. Guys shouldn’t be afraid to ask a girl if the girl can teach them something new, and girls should be willing to help out. We’re all constantly growing and learning in our dancing, and we always have to remember to share our knowledge with everyone, and for advanced dancers, to not just focus on the other “dance elite” and “in-group” when asking girls to dance. You never know when a beginner is going to have amazing talent 
Leave a Reply